Without You
Friday, May 13, 2016
Have you ever wanted someone so much that you feel like you’re going crazy? Have you ever needed someone so much that you feel like you’re out of your mind? Have you ever known someone up close and personal that you feel like you’re losing yourself whenever you’re not with that person? Well, I have. Matter of fact, I kind of feel it right now. I feel it toward my significant other. Without him, it’s so hard to be sober, because I just can’t do anything well. And this is what BIGBANG tries to tell in their song titled “Sober” (맨정신). It’s about the empty feeling inside your mind when your significant other is not around. It’s about the hole inside your heart when your significant other is being apart from you. It’s about the madness, rage, and unstoppable desperation when you can’t be with your significant other.
“The world is cold to me; people’s
eyes are prickling on me. I may be seemed like an adult, but I’m actually only
a child that’s really tall. My young dreams are just faded fantasies; my mood
is like a vast wilderness.” –BIGBANG, Sober (맨정신)
Released digitally on
July 1st 2015, “Sober” (맨정신) was released as the sixth single
from MADE Series by Korean group, BIGBANG. It was the second single taken from “D”,
the third single album from the MADE Series, after “If You”. The song is a
fusion between electronic rock and pop punk, showing a rock and funky side of
the group. It was written by G-Dragon and T.O.P along with Teddy Park. The music video for “Sober” (맨정신), directed by Han Sa Min, was premiered on June 29th 2015 on Mnet. Just like
the lyrics of the song, all members of BIGBANG look entirely not sober in the colorful
and summer-like yet somehow-frustrating video. The
video is quirky yet unique and feels so fresh. As always, our Seungri looks
good in it.
 |
| "Sober" single cover | source: en.wikipedia.org |
Listening to “Sober” (맨정신) makes me wonder about being alone and loneliness. Sometimes, rather than becoming silently depressed, I tend to go crazy when I feel lonely, just like the essence of this song. Who else you can talk to when you’re all alone but yourself? The first verse of “Sober” is like a self-talk with ourselves. No matter how hard we try to act strong, deep inside we know we’re just nothing. “Stop acting like you’re all that, you’re actually the most pathetic. Yeah, try to provoke me even more, so I can have some fun for a moment. If you only chase after money, power and fame, your crotch is gonna rip and you’re gonna fall. They say love is good, friendship is good, but be warned, the back of your head might be in pain.” And therefore, at the lowest point we even feel like we need to see the doctor, in hopes that he/she can save us from this sickness. “Hey Doctor, Doctor! Please save me, because I’m about to go insane. Stop trying to awkwardly change the subject. Hear me say.”
Next awful thing
about being alone and loneliness, besides having no one to talk to but
ourselves, is having this feeling of being left outside alone. It feels like us
against the whole world. No one could understand us and nobody could speak to
us with the same language. It’s the feeling of being alienated. “The world is cold to me; people’s eyes are
prickling on me. I may be seemed like an adult, but I’m actually only a child
that’s really tall. My young dreams are just faded fantasies; my mood is like a
vast wilderness. People don’t understand me, so I just wanna lose it even
without realizing it. Get drunk, get drunk, go to heaven, after I wake, I’m in
hell. I can’t last any longer. I’m like Popeye without spinach; the laughter
bomb is tempting me.” And when those feelings of being an outsider come, we
just want to wash it all away with a drink, because being drunk seems a lot
easier than being sober. But yes, it’s just a temporary escapism. “Hey, taxi! Taxi! Take me away, because this
place is too hard to be in, so that I can breathe for at least a few days.”
Everyone has their
own escapism, since we live in this world full of chaos and madness. And sometimes,
being sober is a lot harder than being drunk. No matter how hard we try to deny
this hollow inside our hearts, in the end, we just can’t fall asleep without
our significant other beside us. Well, at least that’s what I feel. So many
things to do yet nothing can be done because we feel so empty when that person
is not around. “It’s hard for me to be
sober; I can’t do anything at all. I hate being sober; I can’t fall asleep
without you. Time is so damn slow. I’m just growing old. I live like I’m dead.
I have so many damn things to do, but I have nothing that I want to do.” Nights
without him beside me feel like hell. No matter how hard I try to tell myself
that I will be okay, in the end, I have to admit that I always wait for him to
come home. Like a fool, I just open my eyes all night long, sleepless. “Without you, everything is hard. Without
you in this dark night, in this cold world; it’s too hard for me. Without you,
I’m still left alone here, I’m waiting for you. Only believing in you; I must
be a fool.”
There is no certain
formula to face a loneliness caused by the absence of our significant other. During
those nights when he was not around, I just stared blankly at the ceiling,
wondering what he might be doing right then. I try to focus on something else,
many times; watching movies, listening to my favorite songs. However, every
movie always reminds me of him, and every single song I hear sounds like
singing about him. I try not to grab my phone, many times, but it fails as many
as it is. I end up aimlessly staring at his photograph on the screen. I become
so grumpy and moody whenever I’m missing him. It feels like I’m going crazy. In
the end, I grab my phone and dial his number. I curse myself for being so weak.
But what can a mere human like me do to fight love? Nothing. This world is cold
and harsh. And it’s way colder without him beside me. His presence somehow
could give me strength to face this cold and harsh world. It feels like there’s
nothing I couldn’t do when I’m with him. He’s my counterbalance; my complement.
God, I’m in love with him.
“Without you, everything is hard.
Without you in this dark night, in this cold world; it’s too hard for me.
Without you, I’m still left alone here, I’m waiting for you. Only believing in
you; I must be a fool.” –BIGBANG, Sober (맨정신)
제발 좀 잘난 척하지 마 알고 보면 네가 제일 불쌍해
(Jebal jom jallan
cheokhaji ma algo bomyeon nega jeil bulssanghae)
((Stop acting like
you’re all that, you’re actually the most pathetic))
그래 날 더 자극 시켜봐 잠깐 재미라도 볼 수 있게
(Geurae nal deo
jageuk sikyeobwa jamkkan jaemirado bol su itge)
((Yeah, try to
provoke me even more, so I can have some fun for a moment))
돈 쫓다 권력 쫓다 명예만 쫓다 가랑이가 찢어져 자빠질 테니까
(Don jjotda gwollyeok
jjotda myeongyeman jjotda garangiga jjijeojyeo jappajil tenikka)
((If you only chase
after money, power and fame, your crotch is gonna rip and you’re gonna fall))
사랑 좋다 우정 좋다 말들 하지만 각오해 뒤통수가 시릴 테니까
(Sarang johda ujeong
johda maldeul hajiman gagohae dwitongsuga siril tenikka)
((They say love is
good, friendship is good, but be warned, the back of your head might be in pain))
Hey Doctor, Doctor!
날 좀 살려줘요 확 돌아버리겠으니까 어설픈 말들로 둘러대지 말고
(Nal jom sallyeojwoyo
hwak dorabeorigesseunikka eoseolpeun maldeullo dulleodaeji malgo)
((Please save me,
because I’m about to go insane, stop trying to awkwardly change the subject))
Hear me say
맨정신이 난 힘들어 아무것도 할 수가 없어
(Maenjeongsini nan
himdeureo amugeotdo hal suga eopseo)
((It’s hard for me to
be sober, I can’t do anything at all))
맨정신이 난 제일 싫어 너 없인 잠들 수가 없어
(Maenjeongsini nan
jeil sirheo neo eopsin jamdeul suga eopseo)
((I hate being sober,
I can’t fall asleep without you))
시간은 더럽게 안 가고 나이만 들어 죽은 듯 살아
(Siganeun deoreopge
an gago naiman deureo jugeun deut sara)
((Time is so damn
slow, I’m just growing old, I live like I’m dead))
할 일은 더럽게 많은데 하고 싶은 건 하나도 없어
(Hal ireun deoreopge
manheunde hago sipeun geon hanado eopseo)
((I have so many damn
things to do but I have nothing that I want to do))
세상이 내겐 차갑고 남 시선은 따갑지
(Sesangi naegen
chagapgo nam siseoneun ttagapji)
((The world is cold
to me, people’s eyes are prickling on me))
어른 같지만 어린아이 작은 키만 훌쩍 자랐지
(Eoreun gatjiman
eorinai jageun kiman huljjeok jaratji)
((I may be seemed
like an adult but I’m actually only a child that’s really tall))
어릴 적 낭만은 사라진 환상 내 기분은 광활한 광야
(Eoril jeok
nangmaneun sarajin hwansang nae gibuneun gwanghwalhan gwangya)
((My young dreams are
just faded fantasies, my mood is like a vast wilderness))
사람들은 날 이해 못 해 나도 몰래 맛 가볼래
(Saramdeureun nal ihae
mot hae nado mollae mat gabollae)
((People don’t
understand me, so I just wanna lose it even without realizing it))
취해라 취해 천국으로 가 깨고 나면 지옥 얼마 못 가
(Chwihaera chwihae
cheongugeuro ga kkaego namyeon jiok eolma mot ga)
((Get drunk, get
drunk, go to heaven, after I wake, I’m in hell, I can’t last any longer))
난 지금 시금치 없는 뽀빠이 이런 나를 유혹하는 웃음 폭탄
(Nan jigeum sigeumchi
eomneun ppoppai ireon nareul yuhokhaneun useum poktan)
((I’m like Popeye
without spinach, the laughter bomb is tempting me))
Hey, taxi! Taxi!
날 데려가 줘요 이곳은 너무 힘드니까 며칠 동안만이라도 숨 좀 쉴 수 있게
(Nal deryeoga jwoyo
igoseun neomu himdeunikka myeochil donganmanirado sum jom swil su itge)
((Take me away,
because this place is too hard to be in, so that I can breathe for at least a few
days))
맨정신이 난 힘들어 아무것도 할 수가 없어
(Maenjeongsini nan
himdeureo amugeotdo hal suga eopseo)
((It’s hard for me to
be sober, I can’t do anything at all))
맨 정신이 난 제일 싫어 너 없인 잠들 수가 없어
(Maen jeongsini nan
jeil sirheo neo eopsin jamdeul suga eopseo)
((I hate being sober,
I can’t fall asleep without you))
시간은 더럽게 안 가고 나이만 들어 죽은 듯 살아
(Siganeun deoreopge
an gago naiman deureo jugeun deut sara
((Time is so damn
slow, I’m just growing old, I live like I’m dead))
할 일은 더럽게 많은데 하고 싶은 건 하나도
(Hal ireun deoreopge
manheunde hago sipeun geon hanado)
((I have so many damn
things to do but I have nothing that I want to do))
Without you
모든 게 두려워 네가 없인 깜깜한 이 밤이 차가운 세상이 난 너무 힘에 겨워
(Modeun ge duryeowo
nega eopsin kkamkkamhan i bami chagaun sesangi nan neomu hime gyeowo)
((Everything is hard
without you, this dark night, this cold world, it’s too hard for me))
Without you
아직도 이곳에 홀로 남아 너 하나만을 믿고 이렇게 기다리는 내가 바보 같잖아
(Ajikdo igose hollo
nama neo hanamaneul mitgo ireoke gidarineun naega babo gatjanha)
((I’m still left
alone here, I’m waiting for you, only believing in you, I must be a fool))
No, no, no
맨정신이 난 힘들어 아무것도 할 수가 없어
(Maenjeongsini nan
himdeureo amugeotdo hal suga eopseo)
((It’s hard for me to
be sober, I can’t do anything at all))
맨정신이 난 제일 싫어 너 없인 잠들 수가 없어
(Maenjeongsini nan
jeil sirheo neo eopsin jamdeul suga eobseo)
((I hate being sober,
I can’t fall asleep without you))
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