A Weep of Love
Saturday, November 21, 2015
Love is sincerity. Though
I’m a cold and skeptical person, somehow I still believe that love is a sincere
thing. And for me personally, a sincere thing can’t be easily said. Therefore,
when I love someone, I can’t say that easily. Instead, I tend to keep it for
myself. There is just too much anxiety. There are just too many fears. These
days have been like that too. I love my partner. I’m in love with him, so much
I feel like dying inside. Yet I barely say that to him with my own mouth. And most
of the time I feel sorry for that. People are not a mind reader. Though I’m old
enough to understand that, still I find myself hard to express the feelings I
should show and say the thoughts I should tell. In the end, here I am, weeping
all alone while my heart keeps on shrieking these unsaid feelings. There is
this one melancholic song that comes into my mind right now. It’s a song titled
“That Woman (그여자)”,
performed by Korean female singer Baek Ji Young.
“How much, just how much longer do
I have to look at you like this all alone? This love that came like the wind,
this helpless love, will you love me if I continue this way? Come just a little
closer, just a little, when I take one step forward, you take two steps back
away. Me, who love you, is standing still beside you now, that woman is crying.”
–Baek Ji Young, That Woman (그여자) [OST. Secret Garden]
“That Woman (그여자)” was released on November 11th 2010 as the first
single taken from the soundtrack of Korean television drama series “Secret
Garden”, “Secret Garden OST Part 1”. Due to the immense popularity of the drama
series, the song itself also gained success, both commercially and culturally. In
2011, Baek Ji Young won Outstanding
Korean Drama OST at the 6th Seoul
International Drama Awards and Best
Original Soundtrack at the 13th Mnet
Asian Music Awards.
 |
| "Secret Garden OST Part 1" single cover - source: wiki.d-addicts.com |
The more sincere the love, the more it is hard to confess. Well, at least that is what I feel. Thing goes like that for me all this time. This song is a confession. And she begins by telling it through third person point of view; that she knows there is a woman who is sincerely in love with him, that the woman is always watching over him, that the woman is silently keeping her desperate feelings only for herself, that the woman is slowly approaching him only to find him drafting away from her, that the woman is crying inside while standing beside him. “One woman loves you. That woman loves you with all of her heart. Every day, like a shadow, she follows you around. That laughing woman is crying inside. ‘How much, just how much longer do I have to look at you like this all alone? This love that came like the wind, this helpless love, will you love me if I continue this way? Come just a little closer, just a little, when I take one step forward, you take two steps back away. Me, who love you, is standing still beside you now.’ That woman is crying.”
And the story goes on. That
woman finds it hard to say everything she feels. Indeed, every sincere thing is
hard to say right away. So, she’s been keeping it, even from her best friends.
That woman finds it hard to confess her feelings. Indeed, the deepest one is
the hardest one to confess right away. That woman knows it all too well that
the man is just the same. He’s a timid person too. She feels relate. Perhaps
that’s why she fell for him. That woman can only scream inside, that she’s been
longing for him, for his embrace, for his love. That woman can only yearn
inside, as she’s standing by him. “That
woman has a very timid personality, because of this, she learned how to smile.
There are many things she can’t even say to her best friend, that woman’s heart
is filled with tears. Therefore that woman loved you because you are the same.
‘Yet another fool, yet another fool, just once, can you embrace me before you
go? I want to be loved, dear, every day in my heart, only in my heart.’ Crying
her voice out for you, that woman stands by your side again today.”
In the end, she reveals that
the woman is her. She finally got the courage to say that the story she always
tells to him is about her. “That woman is
me, do you know? It’s not that you know it but still act like this, right?
Of course you don’t know, since you’re a fool.” How can someone be so
ignorant regarding to love? Perhaps, it’s because they’re just too busy looking
at somewhere else, hence they can’t realize that the person who loves them
sincerely is standing just right here all the time. How can someone be so
clueless regarding to love? Perhaps, it’s because when we fall in love, we tend
to fall at once and for all. What else can we do when the love feels so
helpless and hopeless? Smiling on the outside, weeping in the inside. “How much longer do I have to look at you
like this all alone? This foolish love, this hopeless love, will you love me if
I continue this way? Come just a little closer, just a little. When I take one
step forward, you take two steps back away. Me, who love you, is standing still
beside you now. That woman is crying.”
 |
| "Secret Garden OST Part 5" single cover - source: wiki.d-addicts.com |
Hyun Bin, gorgeous Korean actor who also starred as the main protagonist in “Secret Garden”, sang a male version of the song, titled “That Man (그 남자)”. This version was released on January 7th 2011 as a part of “Secret Garden OST Part 5” single album. For the special album soundtrack, Baek Ji Young sang her cover of “That Man (그 남자)”. This pop ballad track is the signature song for the drama series. Some soundtracks last forever, and I’m sure that this song is one of them.
“That woman is me, do you
know? It’s not that you know it but still act like this, right? Of course
you don’t know, since you’re a fool.” –Baek Ji Young, That Woman (그여자) [OST. Secret Garden]
“Han yeojaga geudaereul saranghamnida geu yeojaneun
yeolshimhi saranghamnida
(One woman loves you, that
woman loves you with all of her heart)
Maeil geurimjacheoreom geudaereul ttaradanimyeo geu
yeojaneun useumyeo ulgoisseoyo
(Every day, like a shadow,
she follows you around, that laughing woman is crying inside)
Eolmana eolmana deo neoreul ireohke baraman bomyeo
honja
(How much, just how much
longer do I have to look at you like this all alone?)
I baramgateun sarang I geojigateun sarang gyesokhaeya
niga nareul sarang hagenni
(This love that came like
the wind, this helpless love, will you love me if I continue this way?)
Jogeumman gakkai wa jogeumman hanbal dagagamyeon du
bal domangganeun
(Come just a little closer, just
a little, when I take one step forward, you take two steps back away)
Neol saranghaneun nal jigeumdo yeope isseo geu yeojan
umnida
(Me, who love you, is
standing still beside you now, that woman is crying)
Geu yeojaneun seonggyeogi soshimhamnida geuraeseo
unneun beobeul baeweotdamnida
(That woman has a very timid
personality, because of this, she learned how to smile)
Chinhan chinguegedo mothaneun yaegiga manheun geu
yeojaeui maeumeun nunmultuseongi
(There are many things she
can’t even say to her best friend, that woman’s heart is filled with tears)
Geuraeseo geu yeojaneun geudael neol sarang haetdeyo
ttokgataseo
(Therefore that woman loved
you because you are the same)
Tto hanagateun babo tto hanagateun babo hanbeon nareul
anajugo gamyeon andweyo
(Yet another fool, yet
another fool, just once, can you embrace me before you go?)
Nan sarangbadgo shipeo geudaeyeo maeil sogeuroman
gaseum sogeuroman
(I want to be loved, dear,
every day in my heart, only in my heart)
Sorireul jireumyeo geu yeojaneun oneuldo geu yeope
itdeyo
(Crying her voice out for
you, that woman stands by your side again today)
Geu yeojaga naraneun geol anayo almyeonseodo ireoneun
geon anijyo
(That woman is me, do you know? It’s
not that you know it but still act like this, right?)
Moreulkkeoya geudaen babonikka
(Of course you don’t know, since
you’re a fool)
Eolmana eolmana deo neoreul ireohke baraman bomyeo
honja
(How much, just how much
longer do I have to look at you like this all alone?)
I babogateun sarang I geojigateun sarang gyesokhaeya
niga nareul sarang hagenni
(This foolish love, this
hopeless love, will you love me if I continue this way?)
Jogeumman gakkai wa jogeumman hanbal dagagamyeon du
bal domangganeun
(Come just a little closer,
just a little, when I take one step forward, you take two steps back away)
Neol saranghaneun nal jigeumdo yeope isseo geu yeojan
umnida
(Me, who love you, is
standing still beside you now, that woman is crying)”
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