Stop Crying Your Heart Out

Thursday, June 08, 2017



It has been five days and I don’t feel like I’m getting better. It has been five days since my partner left the house and it feels emptier as days go by. It has been five days since my partner moved out of town and it feels lonelier as time passes by. My eyes feel like dynamite that can blow up every time with tears. I know I have to get my shits together and stop crying my heart out. However, it is hard as hell. I know that I currently go through some adaptation phase. However, I guess, the change is the hardest part of a separation. We have to get used to it, whether we want it or not. We need to get used to it in order to move further. We must to get used to it in order to live. The thing is: I’m a slow learner for this kind of thing; romance and long-distance-relationship. I don’t know how long that I need to be able to get my shits together. Am I really living? Or am I just breathing and not really living right now? It feels like half of my soul has been taken away from me and I can never get it back. Tears stream down on my face whenever I listen to certain songs; even a soothing song that tells me to stop crying my heart out. I cry harder listening to that kind of song.

Hold up, hold on, don’t be scared, you’ll never change what’s been and gone. May your smile shine on. Don’t be scared, your destiny may keep you warm.” –Oasis, Stop Crying Your Heart Out

This song I would like to talk about this is time is titled “Stop Crying Your Heart Out”, performed by English rock band, Oasis. It was released on June 17th 2002 and served as the second single taken from the band’s fifth studio album, “Heathen Chemistry”. This brit-pop track was written by Noel Gallagher and most of the time is classified as a ballad or power ballad. “Stop Crying Your Heart Out” did not receive a favorable reception from the critics, but I am not going to talk about that. This song resonates with my current condition so well. One of my housemates played this song on one day after my partner left the house, and yes, it was tearing me apart. I know that life will go on. The thing is: I just find it hard to adapt to this new situation. This whole thing is just killing me.


"Stop Crying Your Heart Out" single cover | source: en.wikipedia.org

Sometimes people will go in a direction you never expected. All you can do is love them, even if it takes them away. Because you should; because that is really the only reason you’d want someone to stay. That was said by a poet named J.M. Storm. Well, I guess he has a point. There are times when people, particularly significant people in our life, will go in a direction we never expected. And sometimes, that direction is taking them away from us. It is just like a lover who goes for studying abroad. It is just like a partner who leaves for working out of town. A separation doesn’t always mean a breakup. However, every separation is painful, no matter what the purpose is. And the thing about separation is that we can never be prepared for it. It is hard as fuck and difficult as hell for both people who leave and being left behind. They must be strong, unless they will crumble apart. “Hold up, hold on, don’t be scared, you’ll never change what’s been and gone. May your smile shine on. Don’t be scared, your destiny may keep you warm.”
Separation is always terrifying. No one can prepare for it. Though I believe that there is no hierarchy in pain and heartache, for me personally, it is so heartbreaking to be the one who is left behind. We might be able to console our partner that everything will be fine, but deep inside we will always feel this fear about what might happen. We might tell them to not be afraid when we are actually terrified. We might tell them to smile when we are crying inside. We might tell them to hang on and be strong when we are devastated and breaking down. “Get up, come on. Why’re you scared? You’ll never change what’s been and gone.” But what can we do when the decision has been made? What can we say when the choice has been decided? They have chosen to leave. They have decided to go. And we can do nothing to stop them. We can only support them. We can only love them, like we always do. “‘Cause all of the stars are fading away. Just try not to worry, you’ll see them some day. Take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out.”
And when our significant other has to go on a direction that we never expected, a direction that will take them away from us, we can do nothing but loving them, just like we always do. And by that, it means that nothing will change except for some conditions. Since distance will bring some changes, inevitably. However, it is not the distance that will break the relationship, but the over-thinking and the silence. Hence, communication is the most important thing of all. We have loved them for all of them; hence distance should do nothing about it. We have loved them with all of us; hence the connection is all that matters. “We’re all of us stars, we’re fading away. Just try not to worry, you’ll see us some day. Just take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out.” Nothing lasts forever in this world; even the stars are fading too. With that in mind, just have faith that the misery won’t last forever. There will be time when we are becoming one again with our significant other. There will be time when they come back to the home they long to be.


"Heathen Chemistry" album cover | source: en.wikipedia.org

At this point in my life, I cannot say much about the ones who are leaving, but I can say a lot about the ones who are being left. On one side, I do not want to be a burden for my significant other. I do not want to be the Achilles heel that holds him back from doing the right thing at this moment. I do not want to shackle him down from going to the place where he is needed to be right now. Hence I have to let him go. On the other side, I know it all too well that my world is crumbling down without him beside me. I know that I will be unwell. I know that I will be lost, empty, and lonely. Hence my life turns so cold after he left. I have too many fears, worries, insecurities, and anxiety. However, I love him too much too to show them. He has suffered enough, and I do not want to bother him with my own problems. I put him above myself. I tell him not to worry. I let him go. I support him. I give him all my strength till I have none left for myself. It is alright though; since I have this faith, that even though we are fading away now, someday we will see us again.

We’re all of us stars, we’re fading away. Just try not to worry, you’ll see us some day. Just take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out.” –Oasis, Stop Crying Your Heart Out



Hold up, hold on, don’t be scared, you’ll never change what’s been and gone
May your smile (may your smile) shine on (shine on)
Don’t be scared (don’t be scared) your destiny may keep you warm

‘Cause all of the stars are fading away, just try not to worry, you’ll see them some day
Take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out

Get up (get up), come on (come on), why’re you scared? (I’m not scared)
You’ll never change what’s been and gone

‘Cause all of the stars are fading away, just try not to worry, you’ll see them some day
Take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out

‘Cause all of the stars are fading away, just try not to worry, you’ll see them some day
Just take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out

We’re all of us stars, we’re fading away, just try not to worry, you’ll see us some day
Just take what you need, and be on your way, and stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out, stop crying your heart out, stop crying your heart out

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