White Flag

Saturday, March 11, 2017



Is there any giving up in love? When you are in love, would you give it up for anything? When you are in love, is there anything that would make you give it up? When you are in love, does it make sense to give up? I’m a kind of person that is hard to fall in love. But once I fall, I fall for good, and deeply. Hence for me there is no giving up in love. When I am in love, I would not give it up for anything. When I am in love, there is nothing that would make me give it up. When I am in love, there is no sense in giving up. Love itself, for me personally, is being surrendered. Being in love, for me personally, is surrendering my everything for that person I’m in love with. However, I’m only human. And I make mistakes. And that is what defines me as a human anyway; making mistakes. That’s what defines us as a human. We made mistakes, we’ve made mistakes, we make mistakes, we’re making mistakes, and we’ll make mistakes. But when the time comes when you have to reap what you sow, would you give the love up anyway for those mistakes?

I know you think that I shouldn’t still love you or tell you that. But if I didn’t say it, well I’d still have felt it; where’s the sense in that?” –Dido, White Flag

The song I would like to write about this time is called “White Flag”, performed by English singer-songwriter, Dido. It was released in September 1st 2003 as the singer’s lead single for her second studio album, “Life for Rent”. The pop track was written by Dido herself along with Rollo Armstrong and Rick Nowels. The lyrics tell about someone who is unwilling to give up, even if they know his or her relationship is over. An official accompany music video for the song was released directed by Joseph Kahn. The video featured actor David Boreanaz as Dido’s love interest. According to Wikipedia, regarding the lyric “I will go down with the ship,” it is a well-known fact that, if a ship was sinking, the captain of the ship would stay on the ship and sink with it. In a battle, a white flag signals surrender. Still according to Wikipedia, with regard to the lyric “there will be no white flag above my door,” in the 17th century, if a captain of a ship wanted to surrender, he would hang a white flag outside the captain's cabin, above the cabin’s door; this white flag would signal to the victors that the captain has surrendered and is waiting peaceably inside his cabin to be captured. By stating there will be “no white flag,” she indicates that she will not deny her feelings of love or pretend that they are gone. This song is very meaningful for me since my partner and I accidentally hear this song played on the car’s radio for many times. Moreover, somehow at some point I feel related to the lyrics.


"White Flag" single cover | source: en.wikipedia.org

We are human and we make mistakes. And sometimes, just one single mistake is enough to crumble a relationship. One single mistake is enough to tear down the whole world of romance. One single mistake is enough to tear apart two soulmates. However, some love just cannot be given up just like that. And there are times when you feel that the love you have is stronger than anything so that your mistake will not get in the way. There are times when you think that the feeling you have is stronger than everything so that your mistake will not be a significant hurdle. But that feeling and thought could be shattered in a second when the person you love cannot accept your mistake as a part of yourself. But the thing about loving someone is, you cannot stop it just like that even when you know they can’t accept you anymore. “I know you think that I shouldn’t still love you or tell you that. But if I didn’t say it, well I’d still have felt it; where’s the sense in that? I promise I’m not trying to make your life harder or return to where we were.”
We are human and we have mistakes. And most of the times, just one single mistake is enough to take our significant other away from us. One single mistake is enough to break the trust. One single mistake is enough to turn the love into hatred. However, some love just cannot be erased just like that. And there are times when you feel that the love you have is more sincere than anything so that your mistake will be forgiven. There are times that you think the feeling is more sincere than everything so that your mistake will be forgotten. But that feeling and thought could be shattered in a minute when the person you love cannot forgive your mistake and give second chance. But the thing about being in love with someone is, you cannot stop it just like that even when you understand they can’t forgive you anymore. “I know I left too much mess and destruction to come back again. And I caused nothing but trouble; I understand if you can’t talk to me again. And if you live by the rules of ‘it’s over’, then I’m sure that that makes sense.”
And then you find yourself being drowned in your unrequited feelings as you realize that you can do nothing but keep being in love with that person. As much as the guilty feeling consumes you, you cannot stop just like that from loving that person. And then you decide to make a mend for yourself; for not stop loving that person, even if you have to do that alone, a one-sided and unrequited love. “I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender. There will be no white flag above my door. I’m in love and always will be.” And then you decide to keep going on with the ultimate sadness from having the unrequited love. No matter it would take you, whether it is into the depth of the hell, you would keep doing it anyway. Since you are in love and there is nothing that could stop you. You decide to keep it for yourself and not bothering that person anymore, even though it hurts. “And when we meet, which I’m sure we will, all that was there will be there still. I’ll let it pass and hold my tongue, and you will think that I’ve moved on.”


"Life for Rent" album cover | source: en.wikipedia.org

There are no people in love who have intention of waving the white flag to surrender their feeling. Ironically, being in love itself is a form of surrendering all of themselves to their beloved ones. Well, life is indeed full of irony. There are times when we feel small in front of our beloved ones; that we feel inferior, that we feel worthless, that we feel we do not deserve to be loved back, that we feel insignificant, that we feel like we are just nothing compared to them. However, those feelings do not make us love them less, apparently. And then we find ourselves being trapped in a beautiful pain called the unrequited love. But I personally think that this is the kind of love that is the most sincere one. That is when we love someone completely for their whole package, without expecting anything in return. That is when we love someone for who they really are, without expecting them to change into someone they are not. This kind of love is dangerous. It consumes us yet defining who we really are. It is weakening us yet strengthening us at the same time. It is our source of death yet our source of life at the same time.



I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender. There will be no white flag above my door. I’m in love and always will be.” –Dido, White Flag







I know you think that I shouldn’t still love you or tell you that
But if I didn’t say it, well I’d still have felt it, where’s the sense in that?
I promise I’m not trying to make your life harder or return to where we were

But I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and destruction to come back again
And I caused nothing but trouble, I understand if you can’t talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of “it’s over”, then I’m sure that that makes sense

I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be

And when we meet, which I’m sure we will, all that was there will be there still
I’ll let it pass and hold my tongue, and you will think that I’ve moved on

I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be
I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be
I will go down with this ship, and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be

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