This Love Came Back

Monday, December 26, 2016



In some time, we are destined to let it go free some love that came into our life. In another time, some love we had let go before is coming back to us. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, but regardless, it’s still love. Five years ago I wrote that, “It was once said, that if you love someone, you got to let them go if they want to. If they come back, then they’re yours forever. If they’re not, then you’re never meant to be together.” I remember it clearly that I wrote that after I let go of someone who was really meant for me back then. Right after those sentences follows, “I don’t want to set my hope too much that you’ll be back. But if by any chance, sometimes, any time, you come back, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right there. Neither waiting nor hoping, but I’ll be just right there. I’m moving on, but I’ll be right there.” Back then I really didn’t have any expectation at all. I let him go with all my heart. Four years later, he came back into my life. And yes, the feeling is apparently still there. The love came back along with him. Some love leaves a permanent mark when it’s gone. Some love is still glowing even in the darkest time of our life. And this love is that kind of love. Though I let it go free with my own hands, it came back to me eventually. It feels so easy at times, yet it feels so hard at another time, but regardless, it’s still love.

This love is alive back from the dead. These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me.” –Taylor Swift, This Love

There is one underrated song performed by the one and only Taylor Swift which I love so much, titled “This Love”. This mournful ballad track was included in her fifth studio album, “1989”, which was released on October 27th 2014. “This Love” was the only song in the album that solely written by Swift herself without co-writing it with anybody else, as well as the only time on the album that she collaborated with Nathan Chapman (the main producer of her first four album) as the producer. In an interview, Swift said, “I think the one that I kept going back to, over and over and over again, is a song called ‘This Love’, actually. It’s a song that I wrote by myself. It’s kind of like hypnotic in a way, and it kind of is somewhat romantic and wistful and relaxing.”  This song finds her using cyclical metaphors to ponder on the cycles of her relationship.


source: "1989" Deluxe Version Digital Booklet

Some relationships are solid, but some others are not. Some relationships are smooth, but some others are not. The kind of what we hope for is not always what we get. Regardless, it doesn’t mean that it is not special and extraordinary. Somehow, some relationships are meaningful in the fragility. Some relationships begin with a good start and have a gloomy end. However, just like tides of the ocean that go in and out regularly, apparently so does a relationship. Regardless, we are going to continue with the relationship despite possible downside and pitfalls. “Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in, and I could go on and on, on and on, and I will. Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again, and you were just gone and gone, gone and gone. In silent screams, in wildest dreams, I never dreamed of this.” Some downfalls lead a relationship to a breakup. However, some relationships are not broken; they are just bent instead. And what seems to be impossible is actually possible to happen at times. Some love just keeps on coming back.
At times we try to get over some love by choosing the easy way: meeting someone new. However, that is just not it; especially when that love lingers deep inside our heart and mind. Even though we try to find a spark with a new lover, that love is still there in the back of our mind. Our feelings about that love is not intense like a light bulb, but rather a tender and lingering light in the back of our mind that won’t go out. It glows softly like a lantern. “Tossing, turning, struggled through the night with someone new, and I could go on and on, on and on. Lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you, but you’re still gone, gone, gone. Been losing grip on sinking ships, you showed up just in time.” Timing is a funny thing. And there is some love we keep bounce back to no matter how many other loves we try to find along the way. Somehow we never really know why it does not work out with everybody else, but it works out with that certain person no matter how harsh the storm that is coming on the way. Well I guess some love is just working that way.
Again, timing is a funny thing. Just when we are losing grip on life, somehow this person shows up just in time to save us from crashing. There is a saying, “If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they’re yours; if they don’t, they never were.” Although it was very painful to breakup in the first place, for some love, absence does make the heart grow fonder and past love grow stronger, it seems. Even though it was very heartbreaking to be separated in the first place, for some love, absence does not make it leave and disappear just like that. “This love is good. This love is bad. This love is alive back from the dead. These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me. This love left a permanent mark. This love is glowing in the dark. These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me.” Some love is just too deep. Some love is just so strong. Some love is just meant to be no matter how long it has gone. Some love is just meant to come back no matter how long it has been separated. And this love is one of those kinds.


source: "1989" Deluxe Version Digital Booklet

There is a kind of love in this life which no matter how many it says goodbye, we would be crawling back to it every time it says hello again. In front of this kind of love, everyone is weak. “Your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave. Your smile, my ghost, I fell to my knees. When you’re young you just run, but you come back to what you need.” When we’re young, we don’t quite understand everything. And love is no exception.  We’re careless, free, and fearless. However, what we really need is the one we love; the one who makes us feel and experience the real and true essence of love. Hence no matter what happens, we will always return to that person. And yes, even if that person was once letting go of us and setting us free, we would eventually come back to them. And even if we were once letting go of that person and setting them free, they would eventually come back to us. It is just one way or another. The point is that the universe always brings some love together after being separated for a while. In my case, it took four years to come back. And apparently, the four years time span is the big cycle; there are little cycles of coming back and forth in this kind of love; like tides of the ocean. At this point, all we can do is just enjoy the wave.

When you’re young you just run, but you come back to what you need.” –Taylor Swift, This Love



Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in, and I could go on and on, on and on, and I will
Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again, and you were just gone and gone, gone and gone
In silent screams, in wildest dreams, I never dreamed of this

This love is good, this love is bad, this love is alive back from the dead
These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me

Tossing, turning, struggled through the night with someone new, and I could go on and on, on and on
Lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you, but you’re still gone, gone, gone
Been losing grip on sinking ships, you showed up just in time

This love is good, this love is bad, this love is alive back from the dead
These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me
This love left a permanent mark, this love is glowing in the dark
These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me
This love, this love, this love, this love

Your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave, your smile, my ghost, I fell to my knees
When you’re young you just run, but you come back to what you need

This love is good, this love is bad, this love is alive back from the dead
These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me
This love left a permanent mark, this love is glowing in the dark
These hands had to let it go free, and this love came back to me
This love, this love, this love, this love

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