505

Tuesday, December 20, 2016




There are some things in life that will always make us keep coming back for it. It is the thing which simultaneously keeping us alive and killing us. Most of the time, it is often described as something we love. Most of the time, it is presented in a form of a certain person we’re in love with. In any case of every relationship, there are time and place where everything started and where it was stable. They are the time and place that had shaped good memories of us and that person. Hence it is very reasonable if we are craving for going back to that particular time and place, whether it is just to reminisce the memories or to be able to feel the feeling twice. For me personally, a person would become a home when we are in love with them. And there is no place like home. Magically, no matter how bad the situation at the home itself is, we will always come back to where home is at. Instinctively, no matter how good the situation outside there is, we will always go back to where home is at. A person we are in love with will always make us feel home-bound. No matter how great the adventure or the journey we have, eventually we will always long and look for home. No matter how far we’ve been travelled, no matter how far it would take to come back home, we would do it in the end of the day.

But I crumble completely when you cry. It seems like once again you’ve had to greet me with goodbye. I’m always just about to go and spoil a surprise, take my hands off of your eyes too soon.” –Arctic Monkeys, 505

This song I want to talk about this time is called “505”, performed by English indie rock band Arctic Monkeys. It was released on April 23rd 2007 as a part -as well as the final track- of the band’s second studio album titled “Favourite Worst Nightmare”. The rock track was written by the band’s frontman, Alex Turner, along with Jon McClure. The organ at the beginning of the song is taken directly from Ennio Morricone’s soundtrack for 1966 Sergio Leone’s legendary Italian film, “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly”. Though the song is considered as one of the band’s underrated hits, it is commonly cited by most critics as being amongst the highlights from the album.


"Favourite Worst Nightmare" album cover | source: en.wikipedia.org

In every relationship, at some point two people must go their separate ways for a while. It doesn’t always mean that they have to break-up. What I am talking about here is the temporary separation. A relationship is built of two people with different background, activity, and interest; in a nut shell, they are two people from different world with different life united by feeling and chemistry. Therefore there are times when they have to be separated for a while in order to live their lives. However, when one of them has to leave the town for quite a long time, the other one often feels too sad that they cannot do something about it. “Stop and wait a sec. Oh when you look at me like that my darling, what did you expect? I probably still adore you with your hands around my neck, or I did last time I checked.” But when we love someone, we would still love them even when they have to be away for a while. And vice versa, when we love someone, we would still love them even when we have to be away from them for a while.
When we love someone, we would still love them even if they are choking us. We would not hold it against them. “Not shy of a spark. A knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark. Frightened by the bite though it’s no harsher than the bark. Middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start.” At times, love is dark and twisted. We fear of failing and not measuring up to our significant other’s standards. We fear of disappointing them and leading to abandonment. The idea of not measuring up to the desire causes us insecurities. And insecurities cause pain. And separation is always painful and suffering. When one has to leave the other, even just for a while, those fears and insecurities are coming to the surface. And when we fight with our significant other, physical roughness or violence isn’t any worse than disagreements or verbal altercation. “But I crumble completely when you cry. It seems like once again you’ve had to greet me with goodbye. I’m always just about to go and spoil a surprise, take my hands off of your eyes too soon.”
It always kills us whenever we see someone we love is sad. We cannot stand to see them cry. And yes, tears are identical with a farewell. When we are busy being in love, the moment with that person flies away quickly, and without we realize, we have to say goodbye for a while, whether it is for going to work or anything. And it is so natural if we feel sad about it. However, at times the sadness turns into anger that could trigger a fight and make the situation got worse. And it always feels so bad to leave the home in the middle of a fight. It feels like we are leaving some unfinished business. It feels like messing up a surprise big time. And it would make us feel home-bound when we are away. “I’m going back to 505, if it’s a 7 hour flight or a 45 minute drive. In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs, and a smile.” No matter how long it would take, we determine to go back. And along the way, we hope that our significant other would welcome us warmly, passionately and happily.


source: www.pinterest.com

As a researcher, what I do for living sometimes demands me to go out of the town for a while. And it always breaks my heart to leave my significant other. He is my home-bound. He is my 505. Hence this song reminds me so much of those times when I have to leave town as well as my partner, even if it only for a while. I cannot do anything about that, well, at least for now. Perhaps sometimes in the future when I have enough money or more established position as researcher then I could bring him along with me. Anyhow, it always breaks my heart to bid a farewell towards my partner. Perhaps this may sound overrated but there is no single second I spend without thinking of him. I know that there is no love without respect. I understand that there is no reason to continue without trust. I understand it all too well that there is no relationship without communication. I trust him; I do. I trust his feelings and faithfulness with all my heart. However, when we are away from each other, I cannot help but thinking that he might do something reckless while I am not around. No, it is not about him; it is just my own fears and insecurities after all. In the end of the day, I always hope that he wants me back home as much as I want to.

I’m going back to 505, if it’s a 7 hour flight or a 45 minute drive. In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs, and a smile.” –Arctic Monkeys, 505




I’m going back to 505, if it’s a 7 hour flight or a 45 minute drive
In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs

Stop and wait a sec, oh when you look at me like that my darling, what did you expect?
I probably still adore you with your hands around my neck, or I did last time I checked
Not shy of a spark, a knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark
Frightened by the bite though it’s no harsher than the bark
Middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start

I’m going back to 505, if it’s a 7 hour flight or a 45 minute drive
In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs

But I crumble completely when you cry
It seems like once again you’ve had to greet me with goodbye
I’m always just about to go and spoil a surprise, take my hands off of your eyes too soon

I’m going back to 505, if it’s a 7 hour flight or a 45 minute drive
In my imagination you’re waiting lying on your side, with your hands between your thighs
... and a smile

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