Stay

Sunday, November 13, 2016




There is a saying “Those who are heartless once cared too much.” Well, I believe so. Holding on that belief, I try to see a silver lining in every rudeness and cruelty that other people direct at me. And most of all people is my significant other. Pain is inevitable in a relationship. That is what I’ve learned in my past relationships. And setting out with that lesson in mind, I try to see a silver lining amidst all the hardships in the current relationship that I have. For I believe, since the very beginning, that this person, this relationship we have, all is worth the pain. And I believe, that despite everything, the point is to understand. And in order to be able to understand, we have to stay. For everything that is worth it, it is needed to be looked after, maintained and cherished, particularly love. And I believe that it will work out only if we look after it. And in order to be able to look after it, we need to stay. My point is, we cannot just walk away from a relationship just because it hurts and makes us in pain.
The essence of a relationship is to understand the pain. If even after trying so hard we still cannot understand, then it is time to leave. If we understand but our partner doesn’t, then it is time to consider leaving, of course after trying to make them understand. However, if we are able to understand, so does our partner, and the understanding can meet halfway, then that is the way we know that it is worth it. And that is when we know that it is time to stay. After all, people with same frequencies belong together. So don’t be sad too long if it wasn’t working and your partner left you. It’s not because of you; it’s just because your frequencies are different. You belong to someone else with the same frequencies as yours. And so does your ex-partner. He belongs to someone with the same frequencies as him. Once you find the one with same frequencies, no matter what happens, you would stay. I’ve found you, Vidi Mahatma Santoso. We share same frequencies, we read same pages, and we speak same languages. I stay. And I hope you do the same.

There’s nothing more that I wish for now, I can’t even tell if my heart is beating. Rather than forceful conversations with others, I’d rather be in awkward silence with you. So stay, wherever that may be. At times when the darkness comes, I’ll be your fire. In this world that is full of lies, the only truth, it’s you. This is a letter from me to you.” –BLACKPINK, Stay

A little bit different from my other postings, today’s posting I wrote a little bit longer introduction above, if you notice. I wrote that accidentally since I followed my train of thoughts, but then I realized that two days ago was the fifth anniversary of my blog (yay!). So i was thinking why don’t I just make today’s posting special for celebrating it? So I said to myself, yes, why not?! Therefore it will be a little bit longer than my usual postings. This time I would like to write about a song that has been stuck inside my head, and I keep playing it on repeat even until now, still. This is a Korean song titled “Stay”, performed by rookie girl group formed by YG Entertainment, BLACKPINK. Since they are new kids on the block, so let me tell you one or two things about them. Consisted of Jisoo, Jennie, Rose, and Lisa, BLACKPINK officially debuted on August 8th 2016 with the single album “Square One”. What makes me feel mesmerized is that they are actually the first girl group in South Korea that applies the no-leader system; it’s a system in which they have no leader among them, which is the first for Korean idol group.
Just in 14 days after their debut, BLACKPINK broke the record for girl group with the shortest time to win on a music program after debut by winning on SBS Inkigayo on August 21st 2016. The group released their second single album titled “Square Two” with the lead singles “Playing with Fire (불장난)” and “Stay” on November 1st 2016. What I’m about to discuss in this post is the lyrics of “Stay”, which was written by Teddy Park, with music and arrangement by Park himself along with Seo Won Jin. This song is a folk pop track with a touch of slow electro hip hop sound. Compared with the group’s other hits, “Stay” is a ballad track that can be compared to their seniors’ hits like BIGBANG’s “Let’s Not Fall In Love (우리 사랑하지 말아요)” or 2NE1’s “Missing You (그리워해요)”. The official music video for “Stay” was directed by Han Sa Min and was released on BLACKPINK’s official Youtube channel on October 31st 2016. On the same day, the video was premiered on Mnet. And just like that, I fell in love with this song.

"Square Two" single album alternative cover | source: bursalagu.id

It’s almost two weeks since this song was released worldwide through digital platform. Yet I found myself falling in love with “Stay” ever since I knew what the lyrics are about. The reason is simple; it’s because I feel related to its lyrics. Indeed, people are easily falling in love with something they can relate to, right? This first verse got me so since I read it when I was having a fight with my partner. “With harsh words, you put scars in my heart so easily, even without saying sorry. I’m comforting myself again all alone. Today, just like always, feeling nervous if you’re gonna leave me. I just want you to stay.” People are weak before love. People are vulnerable in front of someone they love. Hence in that weakness and vulnerability, there is the beauty of loving someone and the love itself. And that is just exactly what I feel. “In your expressionless face that’s getting more and more blunt, I whisper to the mirror, let’s slowly let this go. You take me for granted, but that’s just you’re being you, yet still, stay, stay, stay with me.”
There is no one that could hurt us deeper and greater but the one we truly love. It hurts because it matters. And it will always be. Therefore there is no one that could console us but ourselves. I realize that I cannot fully rely on my partner to comfort me all the time. We’re both human and we have our own tipping-point, particularly when the pressure of the situation is taking so much emotional cost. I can only count on myself to soothe my own emotions. After spending some time alone for consoling myself, in the end of the day, I just want to be with him.  “There’s nothing more that I wish for now, I can’t even tell if my heart is beating. Rather than forceful conversations with others, I’d rather be in awkward silence with you.” After contemplating on what we’ve gone through and the state we’ve been, in the end of the day, I just want him to stay with me. “So stay, wherever that may be. At times when the darkness comes, I’ll be your fire. In this world that is full of lies, the only truth, it’s you. This is a letter from me to you.”
The essence of a mature relationship lies in the way both people understand each other. Rough words in the head could easily become a knife that wounds the heart. Therefore, we must understand that when those words come out, that is just our partner being themselves. And love means that we don’t have to say sorry. Even without them apologizing, we must forgive them, because that is just our partner being themselves. And we cannot blame someone for being themselves. “This sad melody resembles you; it makes me cry like this. Your scent is a sweet felony; I hate you so much but I love you.” Even if they take us for granted, we got to let that go, for in the end of the day, we’re just going to miss them so much to be mad anymore. “Before the dark night imprisons me, here by my side, don’t leave me. Do you still love me? If your heart is feeling the same as mine, don’t leave me today. Don’t ask why it has to be you, just by my side, stay with me. I don’t expect for a lot of things right now, just by my side, stay with me.”

BLACKPINK on "Stay" music video | source: fanpop.com

Even after years gone by, still, words don’t come easily sometimes. It’s hard for people to say that they are sorry, even toward their own partner. It happens to me too. Hence I can understand when my partner finds it hard to say sorry to me. Henceforth I don’t demand an apology. Love means that you don’t have to say sorry, because a mature love will always understand. For a mature love is all about understanding instead of demanding. We must not demand someone to apologize for being themselves, no matter how great the pain they cause; because at some point, we hurt people too by being ourselves. Therefore, when you love someone, really and truly, you got to understand them, all of them, as themselves and not as somebody else. When we love someone, it means that we love them with their entire package. We accept the whole package of them, not just some parts that we like and want and need, but all of them. For when we love someone, really and truly, then we will be able to see the sadness hidden in their eyes, and the anger they keep in their smile. And we know we really and truly love someone when we are able to accept and understand them.
Love takes two to tango. I know when I really and truly love someone when I am able to show my real and true self in front of that person. I feel comfortable to become who I am when I’m with him. Rather than being trapped in conversations with other people, I’d rather being trapped in silence with that person. That depicts just how much I feel comfortable to be myself when I’m around him. I’ve probably said this for many times now, but I have to recite again that he is my island of reality in the ocean of diarrhea. In this full-of-superficiality world, he is the only truth. Only in front of him I can be the real me without even worrying what other people might think. Only with him I can show my true self without even being afraid of what other people might say. That is why I stay beside him. That is why he doesn’t have to ask why it has to be him. It is just because. We both know that there will be ups and downs in our time together. We both realize that there will be hard times ahead. We both understand that there will be many hurdles and obstacles to come. However, no matter what it is going to be, as long as we stay together, we can face it together. Right now, I neither wish for many things nor hope for a lot of things; I just want and need him to stay.

Before the dark night imprisons me, here by my side, don’t leave me. Do you still love me? If your heart is feeling the same as mine, don’t leave me today. Don’t ask why it has to be you, just by my side, stay with me. I don’t expect for a lot of things right now, just by my side, stay with me. –BLACKPINK, Stay




툭하면 거친 말들로 맘에 상처를 내놓고 미안하단 한마디 없이 혼자 위로하고
(Tukhamyeon geochin maldeullo nae mame sangcheoreul naenohgo mianhadan mal hanmadi eopsi tto na honja wirohago)
((With harsh words, you put scars in my heart so easily, even without saying sorry; I’m comforting myself again all alone))
오늘 하루도 혹시 떠날까 불안해 I just want you to stay
(Oneul harudo hoksi nal tteonalkka neul buranhae hae, I just want you to stay)
((Today, just like always, feeling nervous if you’re gonna leave me, I just want you to stay))
점점 무뎌져 가는 너의 무표정 속에 천천히 내려놓자며 거울에 속삭이곤
(Jeomjeom mudyeojyeo ganeun neoui geu mupyojeong soge cheoncheonhi naeryeonohjamyeo geoure soksagigon hae)
((In your expressionless face that’s getting more and more blunt, I whisper to the mirror, let’s slowly let this go))
당연하게 생각하는 너지만 그게 너다워 그래도 stay stay stay with me
(Nal dangyeonhage saenggakhaneun neojiman geuge neodawo geuraedo, stay stay stay with me)
((You take me for granted, but that’s just you’re being you, yet still, stay, stay, stay with me))

닮은 듯한 슬픈 멜로디 이렇게 울리는데 eh eh
(Neol talmeun deuthan seulpeun mellodi ireohge nal ullineunde eh eh)
((This sad melody resembles you, it makes me cry like this eh eh))
향기는 달콤한 felony 너무 밉지만 사랑해
(Ne hyanggineun dalkomhan felony neomu mipjiman saranghae)
((Your scent is a sweet felony, I hate you so much but I love you))

어두운 밤이 가두기 전에 곁을 떠나지마
(Eoduun bami nal gadugi jeone nae gyeoteul tteonajima)
((Before the dark night imprisons me, here by my side, don’t leave me))
아직 사랑하니 맘과 같다면 오늘은 떠나지마
(Ajik nal saranghani nae mamgwa gatdamyeon oneureun tteonajima)
((Do you still love me? If your heart is feeling the same as mine, don’t leave me today))
굳이 너여야만 하는 이유는 묻지마 그저 곁에 stay with me
(Gudi neoyeoyaman haneun iyuneun mutjima geujeo nae gyeote, stay with me)
((Don’t ask why it has to be you, just by my side, stay with me))
It goes a little something like lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala
지금 당장 많은 바라는 아냐 그저 곁에 stay with me
(Jigeum dangjang manheun geol baraneun ge anya geujeo nae gyeote, stay with me)
((I don’t expect for a lot of things right now, just by my side, stay with me))

사실은 바라는 없어 이제 심장은 뛰긴 하는 건지 무감각해 그래
(Sasireun nan deo baraneun ge eopseo ije simjangeun ttwigin haneun geonji mugamgakhae geurae)
((There’s nothing more that I wish for now, I can’t even tell if my heart is beating))
사람들과의 억지스런 한마디보단 너와의 어색한 침묵이 차라리 좋아
(Saramdeulgwaui eokjiseureon hanmadibodan neowaui eosaekhan chimmugi charari joha)
((Rather than forceful conversations with others, I’d rather be in awkward silence with you))
So stay 그게 어디가 됐건 말이야 가끔 어둠이 때면 I’ll be your fire
(So stay, geuge eodiga dwaegeon mariya gakkeum eodumi ol ttaemyeon, I’ll be your fire)
((So stay, wherever that may be, at times when the darkness comes, I’ll be your fire))
거짓 같은 세상 유일한 truth it’s you, this is a letter from me to you
(Geojit gateun sesang sok yuilhan, truth it’s you, this is a letter from me to you)
((In this world that is full of lies, the only truth, it’s you, this is a letter from me to you))

닮은 듯한 슬픈 멜로디 이렇게 울리는데 eh eh
(Neol talmeun deuthan seulpeun mellodi ireohge nal ullineunde eh eh)
((This sad melody resembles you, it makes me cry like this eh eh))
향기는 달콤한 felony 너무 밉지만 사랑해
(Ne hyanggineun dalkomhan felony neomu mipjiman saranghae)
((Your scent is a sweet felony, I hate you so much but I love you))

어두운 밤이 가두기 전에 곁을 떠나지마
(Eoduun bami nal gadugi jeone nae gyeoteul tteonajima)
((Before the dark night imprisons me, here by my side, don’t leave me))
아직 사랑하니 맘과 같다면 오늘은 떠나지마
(Ajik nal saranghani nae mamgwa gatdamyeon oneureun tteonajima)
((Do you still love me? If your heart is feeling the same as mine, don’t leave me today))
굳이 너여야만 하는 이유는 묻지마 그저 곁에 stay with me
(Gudi neoyeoyaman haneun iyuneun mutjima geujeo nae gyeote, stay with me)
((Don’t ask why it has to be you, just by my side, stay with me))
It goes a little something like lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala
지금 당장 많은 바라는 아냐 그저 곁에 stay with me
(Jigeum dangjang manheun geol baraneun ge anya geujeo nae gyeote, stay with me)
((I don’t expect for a lot of things right now, just by my side, stay with me))
It goes a little something like lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala
지금 당장 많은 바라는 아냐 그저 곁에 stay with me
(Jigeum dangjang manheun geol baraneun ge anya geujeo nae gyeote, stay with me)
((I don’t expect for a lot of things right now, just by my side, stay with me))

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